Today, let’s talk a bit about the people I meet. I am
socially extremely active. At one point I was almost a serial dating
enthusiast. That said, I still meet one person outside my family, every day. I
try to meet at least 3 new people a week. I must admit, I have slowed down
much. Over last decade and more, I have met at least 2000 + men.
The truth is that I end up meeting men lot more than I meet
women. This is true for multiple reasons. In this post, I will try and share
some insight into how and what platforms do I meet people from; what kind of
people; why more men than women; and some common categories in which these
people can be classified.
I meet people both online and offline. I am a very
extrovert, easy to approach and communicative person. Or, so I have been told.
I end up talking to my autorickshaw puller (some of you’re rolling your eyes
right now). I do that as a rule. I have learnt over time that the road side
fruit seller, the grocery store keeper, the server at the restaurant, the maid
that cleans up for the next-door neighbours, are some of the most insightful
people I have met.
When I say I meet one new person a day, it means, I sit
down, have a heart to heart, coffee or a meal with them and see what can be
done to drive value to their life, or for that matter, mine. I have done that
with men from tinder, men and women I came to know at my poetry open mics, candidates
I interviewed but didn’t hire, meet up groups, my local Buddhism congregation,
my social media acquaintances, temples, parks, dating apps, professional networks
and even anonymous apps like Whisper for that matter.
My rule is simple. There are stories to be told, stories
waiting to be heard. I want to be one of the people doing that.
Do I talk to all these people about sexuality? Not
necessarily, but in some or the other form, yes. In some or the other form. My
maid talks to me of her reproductive health. The auto guys talk to me about
their families and I divert the conversation to their wives and other women
folk in their family. The direction of the conversation usually goes to their
daughters, safety of women, feminism, communication, sexual discourse and more.
My tinder and other dates are invariably at some point
intrigued and interested in my lifestyle. 99.9% days I come back alone. I am
not really a hookup person. I do hope though, that I leave them with some food
for thought. I certainly come back with enough.
I usually pay for my share of the coffee. I do not drink
more than twice a year, and certainly not with strangers. Once on my birthday
and once when something major life-changing event happens. Otherwise I do not
drink. Period. There are very few people who can convince me for a drink.
I meet more men than woman because honestly, I do not choose
that. Most women on tinder, do not swipe back on me :P Heck, their settings
make it impossible for me to even see them. I work with an all-women’s team at
one of the clients. Rest of the clients are mostly men, because I work with
smaller businesses and usually I work only with the founder / promoter levels.
Apart
from that, the other social avenues usually have a larger ratio of men. My
schoolmates are dispersed around the country and are mostly married and mothers,
so not as easily available to interact as I would like. I do associate with
women on the Sheroes apps and their whatsapp groups and through couchsurfing
and in my various spiritual / religious congregations, but again the numbers
are few. Not something I control, really.
Classification of people, is a subject best dealt in detail
of its own. So, let’s address that in another post someday, I guess 😊
Till then, happy reading and traveling on your paths.
Much love,
Asmi
© Asmi Uniqus 2018
